Select Foods

As with any person with an eating disorder, I feel comfortable within controlled boundaries. This being said, I have slid into this habit where I only want to eat 3 foods: Unsweetened Creamy Soy nut Butter, Bananas, and Orange Juice (not from concentrate). It makes sense when I think about it, as in "if I'm allowed ____# of calories, I want to eat the ones I want."

However, I can't help but feel guilty when I do eat--anytime I eat for that matter. In prior years, I had the closure of only eating certain foods. It made me feel safe, except this round, absolutely everything I do feels judged and a bit reprehensible. This past Thursday, for instance, I binged on those 3 foods...eating what I would assume to be 800 calories. Due to this, I took nine laxatives and, consequently, felt too ill to go to the gym.

I feel like I should be stricter but, I'm already putting up those ever familiar walls. I don't like going to the dining halls here--I always feel like people are staring at me eating; as goes the same for if my roommate is in the dorm, I don't eat around her.

I love the 3 far too much to stop this pattern. It gives me control over not consuming grains (carbs) and not being tempted to break my one plate rule in the dining halls. I hope this will bring result soon enough.

P.S.
Watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show (any of the years). It was such a thinspiration!!

Striving for Perfection,
                       ~Noi

Tips and Tricks to Successfully Binge-Drink

Drunkorexia....some of us may have heard the term or seen it somewhere before. Similarly to Ana, the drunkorexic staves off hunger pains and saves a certain number of calories, after having eaten limited amount, for drinking...well, booze! Being in college has been a learning experience of how to obtain easy access alcohol--and it really isn't THAT hard to get some when you know how to use being an attractive chick (at least to others) to your advantage.

So...here are the simple guidelines to follow in Binge Drinking:
1) Make a lot of connections/network...it'll make the entire process go by smoother and ensure more fun
2) Eat your allowed number of calories before drinking
3) Never drink on an empty stomach!!!
4) Keep track of your liquer intake (i.e. one shot = 100 cal & one beer/wine = 100-120 cal)
5) Make sure you balance out your food with your alcohol...if one exceeds the other you will GAIN weight
6) Always opt for alcohol over an extra meal/piece of food/dessert/whatever
7) The plus side to getting drunk, over being gluttonous, is that you can relax/have no anxiety over food issues
8) Be sure to only binge drink on the weekend, this allows spare time in the week to exercise (calorie burner)
9) End the night with lots of water (prevents a nasty hangover and acts as a diuretic)
10) If you do end up throwing up, don't feel bad about it! You didn't want those calories anyway.

Drunkorexia is, incidently, quite common to find on a college campus...so don't feel alone. There are plenty of other girls that are saving their calories for their drunk days.

Drink up and enjoy life,
                       ~Noi